How I Got A Couple Of Free Energy Drinks

I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want. I wanna, I wanna, I wanna…

Get free energy drinks, apparently.

I know what you’re thinking right now: “Wow, slow down. Start at the beginning. How did you come to this mind-blowing realization?”

Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Let me tell you how it all began:

It was 3 hours ago, and I looked at my phone. Someone posted that they were giving away free energy drinks. They attached a picture too. They had a looooot.

I thought, “Sweeeet! Do not mind if I do.”

So, I texted the guy to let him know I could take some off his hands. (You know me, always helping out.)

And then I waited.

And then I waited.

Then, I waited some more.

But he didn’t text me back.

I was like, “Whatever. Kind of rude to tease me like that, but whatever. It’s fine.”

Life goes on, and I moved on too. Then he replies. Almost an hour after I texted him. He tells me to be there in 10 and what room he’s in.

Now, I live in a big dorm room complex, and his room is in a whole different building. One I don’t have the key to. Damn.

Again, I text him. I tell him that I live in a different building and ask him if there is a way for me to get into his building.

No reply.

Oh, man!

Hmm.

I go to their front door anyway. Just in case. As I walk towards it, I see that it is unlocked. I walk right in. Ha! Success!

Okay, now challenge 2: Figure out where his room is and how to get there.

I press the button for the elevator. While I wait, some dude comes in and waits next to me. I ask him if he knows where the room I’m looking for is. He’s not sure.

I tell him that there’s a guy waiting for me. A guy that wants to hand over some of his energy drinks. I ask my new pal whether he wants to come: “Maybe you’ll get some too.”

He says, “Well, I’m not gonna say no to that.”

Now we have a mission.

With great focus we get to the right floor. We start doing surveillance. We don’t see the room. We walk around another corner. We discover something. A door that leads to a whole new section of the building. And it’s beautiful (the section, not the door).

We’re on the right track. We can feel it.

We look at the numbers. We find the right one. There is a girl waiting for us.

She asks, “You here for the drinks?”

We nod, coolly, “Sure are.”

She goes, “Alright, here they are.” And points to the energy drinks.

There is one case left. One case left full of glorious, liquid fuel for the body and mind.

I do not want to be presumptuous. I don’t want to presume we can take more than one.

I make clever and smooth small talk: “So, you just giving them away, huh?”

A guy steps out from the same dorm and answers my question, “Yep.”

Me: “Cool, cool, cool.”

Him: “Yep.”

Also him pointing to a pumpkin: “You want that pumpkin too?”

My new pal and I are unsure. We don’t really have a need for a pumpkin.

The guy sees us hesitating. He puts the pumpkin on the energy drinks. He says, “Just take both.”

That’s what we needed to hear. Now, we know he wants us to take the whole case. He doesn’t have to tell us twice. We say, “Yes. Definitely. Good idea.”

And take both (the pumpkin and the energy drinks). We thank them. We head back to the elevator. Probably with two big stupid grins on our faces.

I tell him, “Dude, I wasn’t sure we could take the whole thing. Damn!”

He tells me, “Ah, man, I sure would be happy to get two or three of those.”

I start putting energy drinks in his basket. I give him half of the case (which is 12, I did the math).

He is very happy. I am happy, too. We say goodbye.

On my way back to my building, I call my roommate, “Dude, I got enough for the both of us! I got you, son!”

I bring home the loot. He’s like, “Dude, sometimes there are just good people in this world, man.”

I agree. We split the stuff. We’re happy.